Thursday, September 6, 2007

A Teddy Named Tuxedo.

I have a teddy bear that sits by my computer. It's small & old & I remember it from my grandpa's house. The back of his couch was lined with dozens of bears in all shapes & sizes & colors. I think the bears eventually invaded other blank spaces in his house because there were so many of them. I can't remember if my grandpa bought them for my grandma or vice versa. Maybe they bought them for each other. My grandpa just passed away about a month ago. I know it's such a heavy topic for such a silly blog: death. I almost didn't mention anything.

I haven't cried yet that my grandpa is gone, until now. For some reason, all of a sudden, I looked at that bear & felt so sad. I grabbed the old stuffed toy & held it under my nose so I could maybe smell a lingering scent of grandpa's house, & then I cried....I usually try to keep this blog for crafty & creative stuff. But this subject made me think that inspiration can come from anywhere---even from death. My inspirations come from family, friends, even county fairs, late-night tea with my girls, or the passing of Grandpa Bill. My inspirations can come from secret crushes or from a day when I'm in a bad mood, from kneeboarding (wahoo!), or from hiding away in my studio & making stuff. Why are they inspirations? Because they move my emotions.

I'm not inspired when I do the dishes necessarily, or fold laundry, but I AM inspired when I think of someone that I loved, who loved me & who I can't have anymore. And inspiration is the first step to any creative pursuit. My inspirations may move me to cry, or laugh obnoxiously, or do cartwheels (& yes, that's my "real woman" flub hanging out on the left side of the picture!), or squish someone with a hug, or do a funky dance, OR create. If you have not been moved by emotion, you have not encountered a true inspiration. And how can you truly create or even enjoy life then? It's all just paper & glue, without the glitter. Or better yet, a life without inspiration is like a cupcake without the frosting & sprinkles.

***Vote now by clicking HERE for your favorite Ugly Biz Card from one of 10 fabulous artists!! Give your top choice by leaving a comment. A random winner will be chosen from the comments on Sept. 16th 2007!***


  1. >>HUGS<<, Nikki. I understand - I just blogged about my own Grandpa Bill last month.

    I'm glad you can find inspiration in your sadness and get something positive out of it.

  2. See... that's why I love reading your blog...for inspiration! You are so correct no matter where it comes...stirring the soul. Here is a Hug for ya!

  3. Nikki what a beautiful post, I send you lots of love I know what you mean about our Grandpas passing, I still can not cry about mine so far on, I think in my head he is not gone yet, but I last week made some jewellery for my family out of old pieces of his, so yes death can be inspirational.
    Thanks for sharing this with us.
    Love kara

  4. On the note cards I vote for #4. I have to she is my daughter

  5. So sorry to hear about your Grandpa. He would be proud to know that he inspires so much beauty.

  6. Big squeezies sent your way!! My eyes are all watery...and I am trying hard not to snot. Great post Nik!


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