Sunday, January 6, 2013

If I could be anywhere right now, it would not be here.

This blog entry is going to be one that reveals a true peek into my world. (At this moment in time anyway.)
So, prepare yourself for something that might sound whiny. (Whining hurts my ears, so I try not to make it a habit.) 
Get ready to survey a possible protest of the pathetic sort. (If ever I am miserable & full of woe, it is usually only for a wee bit.)
You might notice someone who looks like she needs some empathy. (I don't write this for any sort of "I feel sorry for you" pat on the head.) 

Since moving 5 months ago, I have made zero friends. I don't know anybody around here. I haven't made connections with people who would pass my "Will you be my friend?" test. I don't have any girlfriends to go to the movies with. There's no one I can call to go hang out with. No buddies to link arms with. No giggle fests with gal pals in my near future. No silly adventures with other chums.
Girls Night Out? What in the heck in the world is that?!?!

I sit in my house most days. Or run errands, solo, unless the littles accompany me.
And I am lonely.
I am ever-so-alone.
I honestly try not to think about it too much, or I fear I may find a comfortable spot of gloom.

I do know how to putter around a house rather happily. I am definitely a bona fide homebody. And, don't get me wrong, I am plenty busy every week. But when there's not even the option of calling on a friend for a visit, it's kind of, well, troubling.

I was recently talking to my mom on the phone & revealing to her my lonely state. She is one of my bestest friends ever, but lives 1258 miles away. Which, don't get me started, makes me sadder than saddest. At the end of my "all by myself" speech, she said, "Awwww....I'll draw with you."
Which made me laugh. Because, you see, I recently downloaded the "Draw Something" app on my iphone & have been playing it non-stop.
And it got me thinking. I am pretty sure that I may appear like a big fat loser without a life who should be doing something better with her time than doodling on a smartphone.
But that opponent on the other end of your doodle game? You might be their only friendly interaction all week.

So thank you to all my doodling partners—you know who you are. (And this includes my mom.) You might not even realize the true role you are playing. 

There's a group of people I'm acquainted with at church that I have been trying to get together with. My plan is to have us all go to an open mic night at a bookstore here in town. It happens twice a month. But getting together hasn't worked out due to their schedule conflicts with work & such. Today I finally said to them all, "Come on you guys! You're my only "friends"! I don't have any friends!" *Laughter all around.* They thought that was funny. I don't think they knew it wasn't a joke. But good thing I didn't sound too desperate.
I might have a companionless night alone at that bookstore. And sing a sad song into that microphone.

I think I need to end now with one big fat *SIGH*.


  1. Oh I remember feeling the exact same way when I married my husband and moved from my hometown. I knew noone for over 6 months. I didn't have any local friends and it was a very sad and lonely place. But then I volunteered at church and met this super fabulous gal and we've been BFF's for over 16 years now. In those 16 years I've met and befriended other people but it's my BFF that has been there all along. So if you can just find that ONE. It will make all the difference in the world. Look in places you'd least expect to find them. Remember it's quality not quantity.
    Keep your chin up girly. It will get better!

  2. I don't think you are a big fat loser without a life for doodling into your iphone. That game is simply ADDICTIVE! We can make lots of friends at the support group we'll start.

    And if I didn't play with you, I'd have to clean my house or something equally horrifying and that is simply just not as fun....


  3. Wow. Thanks for posting this. Sometimes other peoples lives look so shiny and happy on the interwebs. I too live in hum-drum, sleepy little town. While I have a few friends, I don't have a lot of cute, creative fun in my life. I so admire how you bring that with you everywhere you go. (:

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  5. Chin up! It will happen and when it does, it will be magical and they will probably be kicking themselves for not getting together with you sooner!

  6. oh how I can relate....i have lived in this community and have yet to meet a friend that I can call up and go for coffee, shopping, etc....and, it has been.....drum roll please......cough....cough.....12 years. i can totally relate!

  7. i am going to pray God gives you a friend a diana friend, anne shirley. the end

    1. :0)
      (And I have been dying to read those books to the girls. Might have to be next on our list.)

  8. I just stumbled upon your post and totally relate! Even the Draw Something I just started!! I have been trying to get a "Mom's Play Day" going at the church where kids can play with kids and moms can visit and maybe get crafty. I have the grammas lined up to supervise kids and get lots of enthusiasm from moms but only one or two moms ever show up. ): I sure could use a good (in the flesh) friend, too. I am Holly SD on Draw Something, look me up, haha! I have waaay too much fun doodling there! (I just did some most awesome vomit, hehe!) I will say a prayer that some friends find you soon. *big hugs*

    1. Hi Holly! I'll look ya up. :0)
      I just did "puke" for my 10 year old. haha!

    2. I found it oddly fun to draw! Maybe being the mom of three boys has something to do with that? BTW, I loved your cardboard bedroom! Since seeing it, I have been toying with the idea for one of my little cowboys. Very cute!

  9. Oooh I am so addicted to Draw Something... look me up omgpop71497135. :) I hope things turn around for you in the friends and fun department soon. Loneliness stinks!

  10. Here, here! Totally agree with you :)

    I've lived in the same area all my life, and though jobs, life cycles, ministry changes have popped up, I've had many of the same people in my life for a while and others who have popped in for only a season. All that said, because of location and other things, I don't have a "BFF" per se that I can count on all the time. I'm surrounded by my 3 boys and sometimes I'm on my own hamster wheel (we all have one, though they vary from each other). So, yeah, "Draw Something", "Words with Friends", even a little FB mixed in can keep me balance a little socially. That little message alert on a game can be the "chin up" in the midst of an otherwise chaotic or routine day ;-) Thanks!

  11. Hi, if you would like another person to draw with, i would love it. My username is jennas1de, i am pretty sure.

    1. Woops, got my own username wrong. I'm j3nnas1de.

  12. 5 years here! Being a stay at home mom is a lot lonelier than I ever thought. I had one friend, one good friend, and she moved away last year. Right about when we had just started calling each other to hang out and I think we had had two "Mom Dates" where we were actually kidless and went out to eat and chat. But now she is gone. :( back to square one. I would love to have someone to chat with or hang out with, or just go grocery shopping with. I have a dream where this awesome lady and her family move in next door and she and I become great friends, to where she just knocks on the door in the morning, after the kids go off to school and she just sits at the kitchen counter and chats with me while I fold laundry. Not the most exciting dream, but oh I would love it to happen!

  13. I live 1731 miles from my mom, and when we 1st moved across the country I felt like I had entered the witness protection program. I knew zero people outside of my house and being self employed working from my home didn't help make friends. I've been here 3 years now. I honestly love it. I am proud of how well adjusted and happy my kids are. My husband still loves his job. I have made good, honest quality friends. I wouldn't want to move back now for anything. I have a very different perspective on my life now. I'm happy and blessed. Everything takes time. Hang in there!


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